TEMPERAMENTS

Should learn to control my temper sometimes and perhaps learn a more diplomatic approach to express discontentment.

I thought that I'm generally a patient person but when I'm super exhausted, really can't help but get really defensive and all heated up over certain things or matter that I don't see eye-to-eye on.

Events drive me crazy sometimes, but I love it!

The downside is that I get super tired and drained and perhaps that's when I get agitated easy.

Rudely slammed someone for unfairly criticizing my work.

Though on hindsight, the person doesn't deserved to receive such treatment because, oh well, the person is older and more experienced, I still feel that there is nothing wrong defending myself in that situation because it is pretty obvious that I was unfairly treated. I'm glad to have the support of one of my colleague who stood up for me...But I admit it was wrong for such a tone. :(

I'm not perfect, I admit...

I take positive criticism if the critic is justifiable and reasonable.

But when you judge me unfairly, I can't help but feel really angry...especially when it is partly your fault that affects other people's performance.

I believe in team work, although there are also things that should be done individually.

But we are somehow divided.

Feels like I'm alone...left out and casted aside with my own crap to deal with. I know it's not only me feeling that way. And there and then, you tried to segregate us even more. 

I feel the need to stand out but then again, can I? Perhaps I can't...

Feel the need to fit into a place in which, perhaps, I don't belong in anymore.

Time to move on? I don't know.

I'm very happy with the people I'm working with, but sadly, not literally working with because we have our own stuff to do. 

It's okay...

It will pass. That feeling of loneliness...of being lost in the middle of something you don't understand or know anymore...

For now, I'm just taking it in day by day, coping with everything - from insecurities to inferiority to stupidity and naivety...

Randomness....

Pimples: Killing me! I mean, it is bad enough that I look super ridiculous and ugly with that red spot stuck on my face, but to have it sting and itch makes me want to just cut the pimple off, (yes, literally just cut the pimple off with a scissors or something!)

Blood: Drops are better then puddles...

Headache: Might be getting one soon...

Insecure: That's what I'm feeling now and it's sickening because it turns me into a monster with a devilish heart...

Gareth Gates: Suddenly his song pops up on my playlist and here I am...writing about him.

Beauty: Currently only Cheryl Burke pops up in my head

I shall leave you with a quote: "Be Patient and Tough, Someday this pain will be useful to you" (How? Don't know, don't ask)

With Lotsa Love,
tammyc