ONE OF THOSE DAYS

Another one of those days where work keeps pouring in and you just feel like tossing everything away.

Then you wish that you have more than just one day. Things never ends and you just want to sit down and basically indulge in doing nothing that requires any brain exercise. Using your brain can hurt.

These few days were plain, hyped up with occasional tense moments.

Generally, I'm feeling laidback for this whole week. I don't know if it's a good thing because I've been delaying a lot of petty work, which I believe would conjure itself into a piled-up work-monster and attack me later. That being said, I just can't get myself to get things done and I find myself in front of my laptop, catching up on tv series and dramas. That's life at its best sometimes.

I don't know why but suddenly I feel that I've drifted away from people - friends, family...

It's like, all that revolves around me is just work and perhaps the characters on my favourite TV dramas. How pathetic...how boring...I missed being surrounded by all my close friends, doing what we do best - fool around and be stupid and oh well, have fun without having to face major consequences. But I guess I should be grateful that I had the chance to experience college and university life, in which I feel is one of the best moments of my life.

I am also lately overwhelmed with insecurities like feeling fat, ugly, feeling that I'm not good enough in everything etc etc...sigh....really messed up.

I just wish that I could just sleep through all these days, hibernate and just be anti-social for a bit without feeling that I've missed out on things. I miss college!!! I miss my friends!!! I miss being that crazy ridiculous me back when I was a bit younger, I miss worrying about assignments...

I mean, I've realized that we can't really go back in time but then these feelings just suddenly arises again and made me sorta stop living the now and continue to dwell on those days in which I believe were golden days haha.

My job and my life now is not terrible. I mean, I'm working with a fantastic team of people and though there are things that I really don't enjoy doing, I think it is really not that bad at all. Nevertheless, it is still very different from the life with the ABC students back in TARC. But here, I guess I am learning to be more matured and a grown-up who has to deal with very very grown-up grown-ups...so ya...it's very difficult because I find it hard talking seriously haha...

Aiyo I think I have to stop writing about the past and embrace the future man! Everyone grows up! I

Please forgive me for wanting to go back lar! I just can't help it...I guess I miss the feeling of having a huge bunch of 'kaki' just hanging out lar...and I especially miss my assignment mates back then when we were shooting our ridiculous 'aqua' short film. 

I always try to remind myself of a scene in Chicken Little, in which he looks up to the sky and says, "Tomorrow is a new day".

With lotsa love

TammyC