LIFE IS AN ENDLESS BATTLE

Life is an endless battle
Don't you think so?

It's like, you can't live without challenges that come right smacking at your face.
If you have nothing coming at ya, you feel bored...you desire that thing that gets you going again.

But when you are faced with so many stuff, you just want to get away from it all, and untangle everything that is knotted up in your messed up brain.
Every day, you need to deal with things.And things just don't end there, things keep popping up and you just need to keep facing them.

When will this tiring battle end...
Or do I even want it to end.
I'm just freaking tired.

ANOTHER SERIES OF VENT-ILATION

First of all, GONG XI FA CAI and Happy Chinese New Year.

A huge shout-out to the year of the Rabbit.

From the fortune telling on TV, seems like it wouldn't be a great year ahead for those born in the year of the Rabbit.

Since when did I become so superstitious?

For one thing, I need to watch my mouth and watch what I say - oh well, I guess that IS GOOD advice since I could have always blurted out wrong stuff without knowing consequences. So perhaps this is a year I find some peace within me?

I was also advised to visit a dentist to have my teeth clean - could this be an indication that I have dirty teeth and will be getting a toothache soon? Oh Lord NO!

On top of that, bad health for the bunnies! 

Once again, a hint to start exercising....Time to force my lazy bum up and do something about getting healthier. Well for one thing, I've started taking Vitamin C....hope that helps :P

I guess at the end of the day, we all just need to stay positive and think positive - that should fend off all the negatives and the 'sui' energy that is claimed to overwhelm the year for the bunnies.

Life has been okay - nothing great but basically, just living it as well as I could.

Have some issues with emotions and self-esteem for the past few days - thinking about life and all; hoping that I'm in a TV soap drama instead of living in reality. Oh boy! Why do life in TV shows have to be so perfect - beautiful actors, beautiful actresses, problems that can always be resolved at the end of the day....oh crap! 

Been feeling super lonely and left out as well these few days. Sigh I don't know why...I mean I have my family, but sometimes, don't even feel like I belong.  I guess I've been stuck for too long at home and all my pals are back in their home town and I just miss being crazy with my friends.

And recently there have been so many dramas going with the people around me and sometimes I just wish  I could run away and start a new life some place else. It's like I have to continue to fake it to live it....

This is so not the way to start the new lunar year man! With all negatives! No! 

I think it's time that I set myself free from the grasps of insecurity and whatever crappy problems around me and start living again. I guess I will need to just disregard everything that doesn't matter and focus on the important things in life.

For one thing, am very excited about my trip to Bali.

One day, I hope I can just be the world traveler who doesn't really need to care about anything, but just explore whatever that wants to unveil itself. 

I miss Liverpool and UK so bad. The other night, I just dreamed about the streets...

I really wish I could be back there again...sigh,...why am I still living in the past? Or is there a future there for me there?