WHEN LIFE HAVE NO MEANING

When you have no drive anymore, you'll find yourself questioning your existence.

It is sad, don't you think?

I am only 24 and most of the time, I have nothing to live for.

I guess I am just lazy to move forward. 

I admire those who strives so hard to survive although they endured so much hardship.

I feel guilty because I am so blessed, and yet, I find no reason to move on each day.

I used to be passionate about life.

And then, I don't know what happened.

I've lost it.

I do not thirst for it anymore...and I don't know why.

Life to me now, is pretty meaningless and I don't know if I'd find that something to spark me again.

The people around me are just faces.

And people talks about people. I talk about people.

I love the people around me - but sometimes, just tired of the antics; heck, I'm even sick of myself.

All I want so bad is to be passionate about an idea, a job, something that is only purely work - and I do not have to care about anything.

Problem is - that's an idealism - something that won't happen.

We need to deal with people, we need to deal with shitty situations and shitty jobs.

So at the end of the day...that's life. And what do we get?

I shall continue to drift and let things fall into place.

I really hope that I find that fire again, because now, I'm slowly losing steam, and desperate for charcoal to light it up again.

10 more days to a new year - and I desperately hope that it brings with it new beginnings.

2011 hasn't been generally kind to me, to be honest. 

I just hope that 2012 is more gentle, and even if it really means the end of the world.